I ignored someone before for 3 months.
2 years and counting.
I haven't had normal conversation with one person for that amount of time.
I was not being asked, I was being notified.
It's not so much, what's the point? It's more like what's the difference?
then I walked away.
The woman reaches behind her. She plops it on the counter, as if to make a point by its heft.
My mother grabs the book and shoves it in my arms.
"Don't you ever tell a child something's too hard," she snaps.
"And never-NEVER-this child."
"So," she said, moving away, "now you know how badly someone wanted you. Children forget that sometimes. They think of themselves as a burden instead of a wish granted."
then I sat down on the sidewalk and cried.
Some phrases from other conversations today:
"Every day is a sigh"
"Its like that, but you still need at least one person"
"Its just two totally different social groups"
"Its hard to find true friends in arts"
"Your eyes look through me"
"Your eyes look empty"
"Its like that, but you still need at least one person"
"Its just two totally different social groups"
"Its hard to find true friends in arts"
"Your eyes look through me"
"Your eyes look empty"
Sometimes you go through it all thinking you don't have the solution, when it was given to you at the start of the day right under you own nose. Godsent.
Its perfect.
My mom, perhaps, even though she understands me the least, loves me the most, and accepts everything. I have not stood up for her enough. I regret that. I love you, mom.
We hold on to the things that threaten to run away, and take for granted the things that stay.
I do not hate, I do not dislike, I simply
do not.
Labels: Mixed.
