I'll explain.
Oh! and if the font looks funyn, its because blogger is acting up again:\
I told Ellisa and Weiyang about dream no.4, and I was lamenting about how terrible it would be if i took 157 back home because I would have to walk a long stretch with greenery and bushes on my left and a road on my right.
I took 157.
Okay, still not bad.
I wondered how creepy it would be if something freaky happened.
Something did.
As my bus approached my stop, all the lights on my side of the road went dead.
Pitch black.
I mentally shat my pants.
I was like, "okay, stay calm, its just a blackout.."
and yet at the same time, " ARE YOU MAD?! this is SINGAPORE, WHEN DO WE HAVE BLACKOUTS ON ONE SIDE OF THE ROAD ONLY!!"
No choice, had to get home.
take one step, another. Walk.
Into the darkness.
I turn back, just to be sure.
Nothing.
My imagination plays the devil when I am alone and afraid.
Its pitch black, and I am very, very afraid.
I mutter " Though I walk through the valley of shadow of death, I shall not fear for thou art with me, thy rod and staff, they comfort me"
And they do,
but I am unafraid only for a while.
I am nearly halfway there,
and I can't bear it any longer. Its just like my dream.
I pry open my lips and let out a feeble few feeble words:
" I serve- ", the lights turn on,
" - a risen saviour- ", my voice steadies,
" - Hes in the world today ", and I fear my road no longer
I don't look back.
It makes me think, and now I think I know why my dreams have been centralised around the theme of death.
Siegmund Freud you fraud, my dreams are not representations of my unfulfilled wishes for death.
My dreams have humbled me, made me fear, and relearn what it is like to be helpless, and afraid.
Fear has allowed me to cast away my pride. The same pride that makes me doubt my God.
It reminds me that I have died, I should be dead, and that the fiends that fill every pit in Hell still want my soul, but my God shall not ahnd it over to them without a fight.
He hasn't.
I am glad to have woken up so afraid that I frantically screamed prayer in my head.
Even if my faith is that of a mustard seed, when it refuses to grow, He presents me with another miracle.
I do not fear that dark road any more.
This wayward sheep has been shown the light, literally, and figuratively.
And it shall go onward, onward, marching as to war.
Thank you.
p.s: I just realised that I have scabs on my left ankle, they have healed and are falling off. Praise the Lord:)
Labels: At peace.
